Sunday, December 18, 2005

Happy 10th Anniversary

10 years ago today Rod and I were married. We were married at the kitchen table of a minister that we found in the paper. I was 6 weeks pregnant with our daughter Brayana and we decided that we should welcome this baby into the world with a mother and father who were married. We were married but not necessarily committed to each other. It was to be more a marriage of convience than anything else.

Neither one of our parents knew that we were married. My Mom found out on Dec 23rd when we went to visit her in Oregon. She saw my ring and asked what it was!! She didn't even know that Rod was there!!! I asked if she wanted to meet her son-in-law. She said she could she was in her pajamas. He said the same thing!!

Rod's parents didn't find out until after the new year. He was going home for New Years and his Mom told him not to come home if he was married. He went home and just didn't tell her that he was married!! After he got back she called and wanted to know when he was going to "make things right" by getting married. He told her that he already was.

That first year was rough. We were so young and certainly NOT ready to be married, let alone old enough to be expecting a first baby. We were not in love with each other but felt that we needed to "put up with each other" for the benifit of our child. We spoke often of divorce that first year and often went out on dates with other people.

As my belly started to grow things started to change. I started thinking differently about this person that I called my husband. I had obviously liked him prior to getting married but I don't think that we were truely "in love" with each other. It's sad to think back to that first year. To think about all of the things that we missed.

I have to say that God knew what he was doing. He took something Rod and I could have easily messed up and he started to work on our conscience. When I was pregnant with Brayana Rod met a guy who was cleaning windows at a store that he was going into. They exchanged numbers. Ron and Glo were a great couple who, even if they didn't realize it, became mentors to Rod and I. They invited us to come to their church. As we started going to church things between us started to change. I started seeing Rod as the husband that God wanted me to have, not just the person who shared my apartment and bed with. I started falling in love with him. He on the other hand was not so easily convinced!

Rod was young and didn't want to become held down. He still wanted to become single and felt that I was trying to trap him. He bought divorce papers from the local office supply store but he couldn't file them as 1) we were broke and 2)we had a child which made him unable to do the papers himself. Once again God was in control!

I know that God was working in Rod's heart as I prayed for him and for us. We became closer and were falling in love with each other. I still remember the first time that Rod said "I love you" and felt that he really meant it! I cried as I believed that the words that he said were true.

At 5 years Rod and I reflected on the fact that we had made it to 5 years. Nobody that knew us then believed that we would make it that far. Rod and I didn't even believe it ourselves. But we had made it and we had worked hard on getting to that point.

7 years and thankfully neither of us experienced the seven year itch. I think we got it out of our system at the beginning!!

Now here we are at 10 years!! We have come so far and looking back it's hard to believe that we have made it to where we are. So much in our lives have changed. God has blessed us with 7 wonderful children plus the privelege of caring for the numerous foster children that have come through our home. I can't imagine spending my life with anybody else. I miss him when he's at work. Our life is full and we are full of love for each other. God is certainly faithful. He has placed many people into our lives as examples and mentors -Dennis and Julie, John and Liz, Betty and Roger, John and Cindy, Joe and Linda,my Mom and Keith, Rod's parents. I thank each of you for being the couple that God has made you to be and for being an example to me.

I thank God for the husband that God gave to me and for many, many more years together!!

2 comments:

Amah said...

I am so sorry that you had such a rough start, and I didn't even know it. I thought right from the start that you 2 had something very special. Maybe you did - buy you 2 hadn't seen it yet. Love, Mom

Liz G said...

So glad to know you both. God gave your whole family as a gift to us and we are grateful. Enjoy your vacation together. We pray for God to bless you always and keep you safe no matter each one may be.